Saturday, June 4, 2011

Squeak Toys?

Soo wassup peeps? That was my ghetto moment and I apologize completely for my lack of grammatical correctness.

Anyways Hi!! I really have missed you this time as opposed to other times when I just said it to be nice. Maybe. Anywho so I've been on some pretty magical adventures recently kids. And do you know where those adventures went down? THE HOSPITAL!!! AHH it's sooo exciting I know, don't over work yourselves now. So I went to the hospital thinger and they were like "WHY hello why don't you just get all comfy on the Tempur Pedic bed and we'll be right back to stab you in the arm with some needles." And of course I stop listening after Tempur Pedic because, well it's FREAKING TEMPER-PEDIC!!!!! Who doesn't want one?!

I'll tell you who: me. Because seeing as I have the bones of a 90 year old woman that bed does NOTHING for my hips. What it DOES do is give me an excuse to use a wheelchair to race down the hallways with the other teenagers of said thinger wing. 

It's pretty exciting. So has anybody else besides me loved books so much that you forgot what they were called. And then you spend like three hours desperately trying to remember the darned title of it? No, okay yeah I wasn't expecting much response on that thing. 

So you know what I forgot about hospitals? They tell you "Oh this may make you a bit drowsy." And you're like "I could go for a quick nap." And then you wake up four hours later confused and really fuzzy about your whereabouts and of course at this time your mother chooses to have run downstairs for some soup so you're sitting on the bed with your knees to your chest rocking back and forth hoping that she comes back soon. 
So I used to frown upon texting in school until I was in the hospital and severely bored. Now if said hospital like thing had a computer I would not be bored because let's face it, the interwebz of course could keep me occupied for all six to seven hours of IV fluids. Now you may be wondering what IVs are. They are a little tube that a nurse will put in your arm via a baby needle. And by baby needle I don't mean a needle that is minuscule I mean one that is, obviously, used on babies. Or aliens. Or alien babies. They never quite specified. 

So I told you of my deep love of old people earlier, but what I failed to tell you is that there are many downsides of being old. One: I will never let them put me in a nursing home. Because they are full of crazy psychotics and drugs and knitting clubs and I HATE KNITTING. But I DO like soup so maybe I'll just go there for lunch and then come back home for a rousing hour of 60 minutes like my grandparents used to do. 
I've decided I'm going to be the greatest old person ever. But you know this already but the problem is that right now my brain isn't functioning quite right since I've had sleep inducing IVs in me for two days now so maybe I should stop writing before this gets really weird.

I had a dream about owning banana pants. They were spiffy.

What would you do if you were a squeak toy? I personally would go to town and freak every guy out in the world. Cause they'd think they were getting an hug and then "SQUEEAAAKK!!" They'd be so confuzzled it'd be hilarious. Okay. I'm done now. 

No comments:

Post a Comment